All Tardied Up Part 2: The Fabulous Jersey Shore

Hear me out. I'm utterly earnest in this: The Jersey Shore is truly a fabulous place to spend the summer -- and spend it we did. Donna and I got in her little orange 1973 SuperBeetle and headed down to Sandy Hook, Point Pleasant (the cleaner, Jersey version of Coney Island--you can get your palm read on the boardwalk, watch movies on the beach, visit the aquarium, after an awesome day of swimming in turquoise waters--believe it! [Sorry, no pics: too busy having an ultra awesome time!]) and Island Beach State Park at the slightest provocation. I have to say, 2007 was an awesome year for the beach.



ON THE DRIVE
You can get umbrellas, tchotchkes of all sorts, etc., etc. on the road to Sandy Hook. Sadly, we didn't buy this Ladypirate and her pet Monkeyboy, who resembles Eddie Munster. A bargain at 20 bucks--now I'm kicking myself! So, what I'm trying to figure out is if he's handing her LOOT or BOOZE. Either way, he's handy!








THE CLAM HUT
Sandy Hook is the best, though, because we always would end the day by hunting out the Clam Hut, and our favorite raw bar-man, BK, who is not only a gifted conversationalist and host, but also has great taste in music. We never want the normal menu, so we can hang out with BK for the whole night and chat. (Sorry this post has taken forever to go up, BK!) He even played the record by the dude who sang "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch," who is his pal and totally sounds like Lux Interior. I forgot the name of the band, though! It's something like Lounge-a...something. I'm a failure at remembering names. But I'm rich in aphorisms about failure...for example: "Success is just a shitload of failure warmed over." And "Success eventually follows all those grand fuck-ups." Yeah. Anyway, back to the beach adventure...






ON THE WAY HOME
You get ice cream. From the Napoli Brothers or from the illustrious DQ (the first job I ever had at the tender age of 14--so I have a soft spot for it). Mmmmmm, Dilly Bar! And those little punks better not fuck up my blizzard--I know the tricks. (And did you know the DQ made CAKES?! I had no idea till we stopped at this one near Sandy Hook.)





I HEART THE JERSEY SHORE!
And don't forget to stop at the superhuge rest stops named after American presidents. They have Nathan's Hot Dogs! And Starbucks, if you go in for that corporate kind of shit.